Sunday, February 6, 2011
Depression
I have really been struggling lately. Most people would look at my life and think "what's the problem?" but it seems I am just not good at coping with daily life. I feel so broken. I thought I was stronger after finding faith in God but obviously I'm not. Although I know God's truths I just can't seem to have enough faith and trust in Him. I feel I am terribly disappointing to God, my family, and my friends. I thought I had overcome depression but it came back ten fold. I can't seem to do even the smallest things, like cleaning my house and making dinner. I suppose it's time to go back on medication while I work through my issues. It's clear I cannot contain my angry outbursts. No one knows how to help me. When I seek advice from my husband and my friends it just seems to make me worse. Today I feel like isolating myself; crawling into my bed and never coming out.
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Sometimes when we find our new faith...we expect God to take the steering wheel. We have to remember that life as Christians are full of tests. But also keep in mind God gave humans free will. So he cant take the wheel and make every decsion for us, but he can guide our decisions. I know in my heart he is in no way disappointed in you b/c you are acknowledging there is a problem and you are addressing it..most of all..you arent losing faith. It might wax & wane, but whose doesnt? They wouldnt be human and w/o sin if they claimed otherwise. You have my # if either you or you hubby need to txt. Ive been in your shoes-house wise too.
ReplyDeleteThanks hun. I feel so much better, I very much appreciate everyone's prayers and support!
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